tablets of human hearts

Day 7

“God is our refuge and our strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear, though the earth should change. Though the mountains shake in the heart of the sea, though its water roar and foam.” (Psalm 46:1-3)

True confession. Last year, Jon and I started working on a book. We were going to call it CAT V. The premise of the book was a category 5 hurricane hitting the Gulf Coast. Ever since Jon saw the Treasure Bay Casino, he imagined a storm pushing the pirate ship casino barge on to Highway 90. With each miss of a storm, I would often comment that one day New Orleans would be hit and become Lake New Orleans. Never did we imagine our idea of fiction would actually become reality. We planned to weave the stories of several characters together as their lives crossed due to the hurricane and its aftermath. I had even begun character development and Jon was working on the storm track and timeline. Never could we have come up with the scenario such as what has played out this past week. Somehow, I don’t think our story will be written. Because it is being lived out in the lives of millions.

Over the years, I have developed the desire to talk to missionaries and capture stories of God’s grace and power in their lives. The future Jon and I are praying about would provide the opportunity to do so. However, maybe the Lord would have me write about a real category 4-5 storm, hurricane Katrina, and the real stories of God’s grace and power in the lives of survivors. In the midst of devastation and loss, I know God’s love is evident in His people. What a blessing it would be to be able to tell their stories.

We took a drive to the Texas Hill Country today, to spend the afternoon at our land. It was good to get the kids out of the house and outside for a while. The land is always so peaceful and quiet. The kids had the opportunity to run around and swim in the river. Sitting on the swing, over looking the countryside, it is hard to imagine what we’ll soon be going home to and what our friends and coworkers are currently dealing with. It seems very surreal, like an incredible action packed movie with awesome special effects. But it’s real and there are real people living through the tragedy.

Continue to pray for our policemen, our firemen, our emergency workers and our military personnel involved in the rescue and clean up work. They are facing death, fear and despair every day. They must be bone weary and soul weary. Pray that God would strengthen them through His great power. And continue to pray for those who are still looking for loved ones. Pray that God would provide them joyous reunions.

God bless each one of you as you consider each day how you can be a part of our country’s help and healing to those living on the Gulf Coast.

Grace & Peace

Day 6

It is hard to believe that it is a holiday weekend. It definitely doesn’t feel like one for those affected by Katrina. We went to Costco today and started stocking up water, non perishable foods and other items we’ll need when we head back. Jon also bought another generator (we have a feeling that the one we bought earlier this summer may have been ruined by flood waters) and gas cans. I called USAA to notify them of the damage to our home. Since we did not have flood insurance, they will only cover our food items lost due to lack of electricity. I also filed a claim with FEMA online. They’ll send us a claims package and send an assessor to our home, eventually. I still need to notify our other insurance agency about wind damage. We may be eligible for roof repairs.

We’ve received additional information on friends and coworkers. Some have suffered very little damage, while others have lost everything. It just depends on the locations of the home. There are still many we are hoping are okay, that we have not yet heard about.

I thought about our losses and what our insurance will not cover. It occurred to me that those who lost much or lost all they had may be angry because of those who did not lose anything. There will also be some that will feel guilty for having come through the storm unscathed. The Lord, however, reminded me of the fact that Job probably did not have insurance on his belongings when Satan was allowed to take away all that he had, even his children. Job’s response? “Shall we receive the good at the hand of God and not receive the bad?” (Job 2:10) In the long run, his trust in the Lord was the best insurance he could have. For the Lord “restored the fortunes of Job”, “gave Job twice as much as he had before” and “blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning”. (Job 42:10,12) Of course, I’m not saying the God will give us more than we had before, I am merely trusting Him with what we’ve lost. We cannot understand God’s plan in all of this, we can only praise Him for His goodness and ask that He would be glorified through it. Be assured, I’m not dismissing the pain, anger and frustration that trials bring. Especially for those who lost loved ones, jobs, homes and all their possessions. Job experienced all of these for many days and I know that we too will have some very trying days ahead. But to God be the glory and to Him be submitted everything, because we do not have control over it anyway. We must keep in mind that “all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28). Even all things that include a hurricane called Katrina.

We found a wonderful church nearby, Bandera Road Community Church, (very much like the Church at Rancho Bernardo that we attended in San Diego) and attended the Saturday evening services. As I prayed during worship, my prayer was that through the winds and waves of Katrina, the Lord would bring salvation to those who would never have otherwise known the name of Jesus. May God raise up His people to speak hope and bring healing to the lost and hurting. May countless numbers inherit the imperishable through the loss of what is only temporary. From the flood waters that filled a city of darkness, may God cause of flood of His mercy and grace to fill the lives of people who never would have known Him, had Katrina never blown. Hundreds of thousands of people have been displaced. May God bring them face to face with His love through His people. May the Christians who live (or lived) in the disaster stricken places be a light to those around them. May God provide us opportunities to share Christ and His purpose with people whose lives we touch because of a hurricane called Katrina.

In His mercy and by His grace

Grace & Peace

Day 5

We didn’t get as much accomplished today as I would have liked, but we’re taking one day at a time. By the time we finished talking on the phone to everyone (work, family and friends), it was time to take Jonny to his hospital appointment. The school district was only ½ day today, so we didn’t get a chance to get the kids enrolled. We have made some preliminary decisions. We’re planning on taking Daniel and Spencer (Bob & Staci’s son) to Mullin to stay with Jon’s brother and sister-in-law (thank you Bubba and Vonnie) and attend school there. Heather, Samantha (Bob and Staci’s daughter) and Jonny will stay here in San Antonio with Jon’s parents. Samantha and Jonny will attend school here. Heather will look at applying for a job and possibly attending college part time. We’re going to head back later next week. Although the logistics are going to be very trying. With gasoline being as scarce, we won’t be able to travel about very much once we get there. I’m also not looking forward to the lack of communication. Although I can probably do without the constant barrage of news coverage.

Our pastor was able to assess the damage in our house today. It was confirmed that about 2 feet of water flooded our house. There will be a lot of work to do to clean up. And a lot of tears shed as I sort through all the damaged things. I try to allow myself to grieve, but also try to remember that there are so many who have lost everything. Our loss is just a big mess to clean up. Bob jokingly stated that Jon and I should each make a list of the things we’d want to replace first. I merely replied that the things on my list are irreplaceable. I have a feeling that water filled my cedar chest which contains my journals all the way back to high school, as well as my yearbooks and other items of remembrance. Thankfully our family albums were on higher shelves so they should be okay. Does anyone have any idea whether water permanently damages family videos?

I was able to talk to a couple of dear friends today.   Kelli, thank you so much for your encouraging words and your prayer. It was exactly what I needed. Judy, I am so glad to hear Rachel and her family are safe. I know she is struggling with the loss of her home as so many are. I want to thank everyone again for your encouraging emails.

I hope you all have an enjoyable weekend. Continue to pray for our leaders as they deal with this enormous situation. Pray for strength and endurance for all those who are providing assistance and protection to the victims of Katrina. And pray that discouragement and despair would not overwhelm those affected. Pray also that Katrina would not be used to divide our country, but rather to unite her in one purpose and one cause.

In all things, may God work His glory and His goodness.

By His Grace

Grace & Peace

Day 4

Today dawned clear and beautiful and I hugged my children, thankful they are safe and comfortable. So many mothers are waiting with their children to be evacuated in sweltering temperatures, fearing for their safety and wondering when they will have food and water and shelter. It seems that the gates of hell have been opened in the bowels of New Orleans and evil is running amuck. I am horrified and disgusted at the reports of violence and anarchy coming out of the city. What tragedy that our national guard and New Orleans police have to fill the role of protectors of the rescue effort rather than being rescuers themselves. Pray for all the innocent who are still trapped in the city and want nothing more than to get their families to safety.

Tonight, as we sit in an air conditioned living room watching football, my heart breaks for all those who are sitting in shelters, surrounded by thousands of other refugees. It all seems surreal, like a nightmare we will wake up from and everything will be the way it was last week. But its not and it never will be. Life on the Gulf Coast has been altered forever.

Jon and I took Jonny to Lackland Air Force base today, to the military hospital. As many of you know, Jonny broke his arm Friday and Jon spent the evening at the emergency room. He needed his follow up appointment this week, and since we couldn’t get back to Keesler Air Force base, we took him here in San Antonio. While we were there, we changed the kids’ medical provider to Lackland and obtained a Power of Attorney for Jon’s mom. Tomorrow I will visit the schools to see about enrolling Daniel and Jonny. We have such limited information to make decisions, but we cannot continue to sit here and do nothing. We will leave the kids here when we do return to Mississippi, because we have no idea when any sense of normalcy will return to our neighborhood.

I long to get involved in the rescue effort. We’re currently waiting for direction from our commands as they continue to assess the situations of everyone involved and begin to make plans for our future operations. However, I’m thinking about volunteering at the local shelters to assist with those who do not have a home to go home to each night. I can’t just sit by in comfort while my neighbors are suffering. I want to offer comfort to the hurting that only God can bring in times like these. Please pray that God would give us wisdom and guidance in what he would have us do.

Continue to pray as our country struggles with how to deal with this situation. Pray for our leaders who must make tough decisions, even as many are politicizing the situation. Pray for the local authorities who are in the midst of the tragedy. Pray for the safety of the authorities. Pray that relief efforts will be quickly coordinated and implemented to the hard hit areas. Sometimes it is overwhelming. But remember, “the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” (Romans 8:26) When we are struggling with how to pray, the Holy Spirit will help us. God is still in control, even though it seems for so many people that the world has been turned upside down.

In His mercy

Grace & Peace

Day 3

As the shock slowly fades, reality becomes overwhelming. Emotions are fragile and bubbles of grief fracture the feeble attempts I make to maintain composure. I found myself this morning and throughout the day, on the edge of tears. Just when we think we’ve seen the worst, more stories pour in.   The needs of masses of humanity become overwhelming, the enormity of the situation engulfs us, tragedies are discovered, but miracles are also found. We’ve found links of video footage of our neighborhood, of the surrounding towns. My composure crumbles as I see the devastation and not only the devastation, the death.   Please pray for those who have the horrible task of searching the devastated homes. They will need more strength than is humanly possible.

I want to thank each of you that have emailed me. Your thoughts and prayers mean more than you can know. They give me the strength I need. I am so very thankful. I know there is a long road ahead for so many people. I have found strength to pray and long to be with some of you that we might pray and cry together.

Today Jon and Bob drove up to Mullen Texas, to Bubba’s home, Jon’s brother. Bubba has graciously offered to allow our 100 lb German Shepherd to stay at his farm until we are in a position to bring him home again. While Jon was there, he picked up a trailer Bubba has. When we are able to head back to Mississippi, we don’t plan on going back empty handed. We will load up with food, water and whatever else we’re told is needed.

Right now, we’re waiting to see what we will do. We’ve heard from our commands and will be in contact with them each day as they assess the situation of each command member and their families. We’ve heard from our Pastor. He and his family are safe. He headed back to Mississippi today. His home and our church seem okay. I’m sure he is checking on many of the church members who remained during the storm. It just occurred to me that many of them may very limited contact with the outside world. They are a couple of miles north of I10. How much do they know? Do they know that the entire Gulf Coast of Mississippi has been destroyed? Do they know that the entire city of New Orleans is being evacuated because the city is uninhabitable?

As I drove down the street here in San Antonio, I wanted to stop and ask the people that passed by, what would they think that if tomorrow, their entire city was devastated and uninhabitable? If the street we were driving down was suddenly under 20 feet of water?
When we were driving across Texas early Monday morning, a late night radio commentator was reading an email from someone in San Diego who asked “What would it do to the American psyche if one of its major cities no longer existed?” Are we finding out?

In the midst of all of this, I am thankful that in Christ Jesus, we have an “inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade—kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power” 1 Peter 1:4-5. For whatever this life brings, good or bad, God is our refuge. Psalm 143 also becomes a cry for those who are suffering in the midst of ground zero. Continue to pray for our leaders. Pray for the mobilization of our country to meet the needs, immediate and future, of people who do not know what tomorrow will bring. May we see Jesus in each face, giving water to the thirsty, food to the hungry and shelter to the so many that are now homeless. The need is great.

Praying for miracles.

Grace & Peace